An Attempt at Explanation

Tomorrow evening I will be getting on a plane to Bangkok and I do not know when I will next touch down on English soil. I have a return ticket booked, for the 18th June next year, but I also have a Visa that means I do not need to leave Australia on this day or indeed for many days after that, if it doesn't suit me. I would say "I'll definitely be back, sure, I'll miss everyone too much to stay away longer". However, nothing seems that sure anymore.

Just 8 weeks ago I was employed in a job that I loved, devoting all my time to my friends and family, planning short-break holidays to the Maldives, viewing flats off Brick Lane and weekending with loved ones in Canterbury, attempting to resuscitate long dead romantic relationships and making a list of hobbies that I thought I should master in the next 12 months; just merrily going about the life that had grown and bloomed around me. Then I spent an inconspicuous inebriated Sunday afternoon in a favourite pub on the Globe Road with a friend who was soon to travel around Asia, and decided that I too felt like stepping out of the soil, right onto runway tarmac.

I partly blame his enthusiasm and restless anticipation about his own adventure for my sudden decision to 'up and leave'. But I know that's not really the reason I made such a spontaneous dash to the travel agent the next day. I have a passion for Gallivanting and a yearning for Goodness. I have mastered the art of enjoying myself - travel, parties, drinking, dancing, irresponsibility and occasional debauchery. I also know that there's more than this, and set off tomorrow to find it. So, you see my friends this is why I can only call this an attempt to explain. I hope it becomes clearer to me and you both while I travel and write and write about travel. At least it finally got me blogging. xxx

'Goodness but not greatness. How can she go on living her life knowing what she knows, that women are excluded from greatness, and most of the bloody time they choose to be excluded? Going on their little tiny trips instead of striking out on voyages.... The voyage out, yes.'

Unless, Carol Shields.